You Have Q's, We have A's!

Our most frequently asked questions are below but if you have a question that you don't see, send us a message.

WHAT DOES NACHO KIDS MEAN? I DON’T GET IT.

Nacho Kids is a play of words on the phrase “Not Your Kids”. Say “Not your kids” quickly and it sounds like Nacho Kids. There is a story behind it as well, which we talk about often on the podcast.

WHAT IS NACHOING AND THE NACHO KIDS METHOD?

Nachoing is what we call the act of using the Nacho Kids Method (in part or in full). Nachoing is often used as slang meaning "to disengage appropriately".

The Nacho Kids Method is the process (some call it a lifestyle) used to massively lower your stress and create dramatic positive change in your relationships. We use a number of successful techniques, strategies, and tactics to accomplish this. We've studied (and continue to study) what works and what doesn't work when it comes to improving relationships, communication, and self. We carefully blend these tools into our method to give blended families quick and lasting results.

THE NAME NACHO KIDS SOUNDS MEAN AND INSENSITIVE. WHY WOULD ONE SAY THAT ABOUT THEIR STEPKIDS?

It’s a pun and more importantly, it is reality. They are not your kids. By law they are not your kids. By birth they are not your kids. By the natural forces that be, they are not your kids.

ISN'T THE NACHO KIDS METHOD JUST ANOTHER NAME FOR DISENGAGING?

Nope. While the first step of our method is to introduce disengaging, the Nacho Kids Method is much more comprehensive than a single step. Disengaging most often relieves immediate pressure but it does not even begin to address the symptoms, problems, resentment, pain, and other challenges that must be addressed. The Nacho Kids Method addresses each of these and much more.

WHY DISENGAGE?

By stepping back from the parenting of the stepkids, you open the space for your significant other to step up. Some may need a bit of a push, but their kids are their responsibility and you did not marry them to take over their parental roles.

WHAT IF I DISENGAGE AND MY SIGNIFICANT OTHER DOESN’T STEP UP?

Then that’s what happens. It identifies things the significant other needs to work on. You have to be realistic in your disengaging and you also have to take things slowly. It’s a process. Your significant other isn’t going to turn into June Cleaver or Andy Griffith overnight. If they let their kids walk all over them and manipulate them, then that’s their choice. They are the parent. You can only hope to have a positive influence on them.

IF I DON’T PARENT THE STEPKIDS, THEN WHAT IS MY ROLE?

Your role is to help the bio parent with their kids, if they ask for it. Your help should not be assumed. Taking over the parenting role from the bio parent often results in resentment on all sides.

THE STEPKIDS’ BIO MOTHER IS HORRIBLE TO ME, WHAT DO I DO?

You Nacho her too! Why are you dealing with her, she’s your significant other’s baggage, not yours.

HOW LONG DOES THE NACHO KIDS METHOD TAKE?

As with nuclear families, the dynamics of blended families change over time. This is the same for the Nacho Kids Method. You adapt it to your needs wherever you are at that point in time and change as your blend does.

HOW MANY LEVELS OR STAGES ARE THERE OF NACHOING?

There are a gazillion trillion because everyone’s situations are different. So many variables have to be considered. We do however, have Nachoing broken up into three main levels for categorical purposes. We also consider re-engaging as one of the stages of the Nacho Kids Method.

DO I HAVE TO DISENGAGE FOREVER?

No. The ultimate goal of Nacho Kids is to re-engage in a different role when the time is right. Some may never choose to re-engage, and that’s ok. If you choose to re-engage, we can help you through that process as well.

Save Your Sanity & Your Blended Relationships.

Join THE NACHO KIDS ACADEMY TODAY!