When my son was little, every other Friday, I would always take him home from daycare, bathe him, dress him in the “daddy outfit” for the weekend and take him to his dad. He would keep him until Sunday. No, I don’t dress him in fancy clothes to go to his dad’s and he usually wears a pair of “play” shoes to his dads because most the time when I picked him up he was muddy or had been playing in the creek in the shoes, etc. Ok, he’s a kid. No big deal, so I prepare for it… Several times he has come back without his coat, rubber boots, you name it. I might be a little over the top with the clothes things sometimes but it just makes me feel bio dad is not very responsible at times.
And it always happens… the SOCKS! Funny the things that annoy us. I try to buy good socks for my son, like ones that fit and usually Hanes. Well, it never fails, he seems to come back with the no name, floppy too big socks. I try to let him wear those back to his dads when he goes back the next time; hoping I never see those socks again. They really are horrible. They are probably hand me downs… Ooh… I don’t like sock hand me downs, shoe hand me downs or underwear hand me downs. We are all about hand me downs, but when my son came home with his dad’s girlfriend’s kid’s underwear on, that was it! I can’t have my baby wearing someone else’s drawers! That’s just disgusting. I don’t care how many times you washed them. I think his dad got the point when I started sending extra underwear. Really though, why should I have to tell him those things? I’m one of those moms that sends everything I can with him. I have to make sure he has water, food, entertainment (ipod, books), etc. Yeah, I think I’m a little OCD.
It’s not just my ex. With the NachoKids (step kids), we have the same issue. They come to us wearing pants with holes in them, socks with holes in them and underwear that should be thrown away as well. So of course, we can’t send them back in those clothes because they have to wear uniforms at school, so you can’t send them with holes in their britches (or pants for those who do not know what britches are). We have five NachoKids, so replacing pants for the other parent is a bit costly. Now granted, I always do try to see the other side of things. Well, I think I do, others may disagree. So, the pants may have not had a hole in them when they left the house that morning but I promise you the holes in the socks had been there a while and the underwear had definitely hit its expiration date long before I saw it. I could understand if the kids did laundry because they wouldn’t throw them out but I know they don’t do laundry. The NachoKids actually get mad if I throw their holey socks away… I mean really mad… go figure on that one. Add it to the list of crazy things with no explanation.
I know it’s not just us that have this problem, a friend of mine’s child was wearing a size 10/12. She sends him in nice clothes because she always dresses him nicely. Anyway, the child comes back from his bio dad’s wearing size 6 shorts and a small shirt!!! Oh lawd, she was fit to be tied! I was wondering how that little boy even could get in a size 6. The picture in my mind as she is telling me this is quite funny. Almost like the style of when guys wore half shirts and those way too short shorts! Poor child probably couldn’t breathe! She still has this problem and I don’t see that changing on her end. But the good thing is, at least it’s only every other weekend the child has to be squeezed into clothes way to small for him because his dad doesn’t ask her to send clothes and he doesn’t go buy him any. Of course she wouldn’t be so willing to send clothes, because she knows she will never see them again.
So, here we are, another battle with the BM and BD of the NachoKids and more burden/responsibility on us. You know some people would think “pick your battles”. I understand and appreciate that and diligently try to do so; however, I don’t want my NachoKids or kids looking like ragamuffins! I try not to be judgmental of people’s looks, but there is no sense in a child having poor hygiene when their parents have the means to provide showers, clothes, etc. and can afford it) nor should they be sent to school wearing pants that are 4 inches too short on them, walk around with unwashed hair and body – ooh stinky boys!!! – and come back wearing clothes the Goodwill wouldn’t accept or clothes they have been wearing for 3 days!
Ok, so I’m not stressing over the clothes thing as much anymore because my son is old enough now for me to remind him to get his clothes or text his dad to tell him he left them… plus, I’m too stressed over the fact that he’s “misplaced” three jackets at school. Lost and found is more like his personal closet at times.
The clothes issue is one of the many things that stress a lot of Nacho Moms and actually some dads as well. I hear and read about it all the time. You can’t help but wonder if the ex does it on purpose in case you have plans to take the child somewhere when you get them back on Sunday. You can’t very well take them out to eat when it looks like they just crawled out of a mud hole. Well, we have learned and the good thing is, we know not to plan anything because we never know what the kids will look like when we pick them up. I do have to point out for the most part my son takes a shower before he comes home on Sunday, but he comes back in clothes that seem dirty. Go figure. Oh wait, those are the clothes from Friday I wanted him to wear back… Thanks for sending them back this time you could have washed them. Man, they can’t ever get it right!!